omg, wat ive been doing..

was at east coast park last thurs, 22nd i guess.. was on e beach, picked up a small pebble tt i liked on 1st sight.. was holding it in my rite hand.. however, it was lost into e moving wave of sea water again in my attempt to pick up another one.. well, i regretted for e attempt, for i failed to get another one n yet i lost e previous one.. its like, i got nothing in e end.. i think tts e result of being greedy, n not noeing how to treasure wat u hav in ur hand.. it may b seemed as a trivial matter, bt when it is applied to e real world, i can tell u e feeling sucks.. hai..
here i am, dunno wat i ve been doing from march till now.. known him since march, though friendship not really tt deep.. took it for granted, then noes how foolish i am.. bt when i c it in another angle, u sure we re tt close..? if it is b4, there is a definite answer.. however, now im unsure it myself.. there r too much tt i did not noe or understood.. ive been feeling happy n fulfilled, bt r e feelings fake or jus out of imaginations..?
anyway, i dunno when it started, mayb on e 3rd day..? im not sure it myself.. if all tt didnt happen, will anything change?
N BTW WAT KIND OF REACTION IS TT?! NOTHING CHANGED B4 ANYONE SAID ANYTHING, YET EVERYTHING CHANGED AFTER TT.. WAT UVE BEEN UP TOO?! WAT HAV U BEEN DOING?! LIVE ON N ENJOYING URSELF IN SUCH A SELFISH WAY.. U DON FIT TO B HUMAN BEINGS..
hav i hurt someone in an in deliberate way? i dunno..
wat u get is wat u put in urself..
i finally realised tt there is one kind of ppl on e world tt everyone would like to get close to u without u putting much effort.. alrite mayb u did, bt e result is beyond.. i think tt must b ones personal x factors bah.. being easily accepted n welcomed by everyone..
is it true tt diff past encountered caused diff preference in ppl? no common interest or shared memories meant no friendship..? bt, i understood y he liked e song, finally..
well, wat r u still asking for? i don get u.. doesnt e present situation satisfy u.. jus go change e damn bloody attitude of urself manx..

i rmb everything tt i rmb, things by u.. sometimes i realise how irritating memory is..